Zen Garden > How to Attract Good People Into Your Life - Part 2 of 2

We are attracted to people of similar values, ideals and mindsets. Consequently, if you constantly strive to become a better person you will tend to attract people with similar high qualities into your growing circle of influence.

In Part 1 I also promised a little exercise that I said you would find interesting. Here it is:

You will need a pencil and a piece of paper for this. Before we begin, draw a line across the centre of the page to separate it into two halves. Next, I want you to think of two people.

First, I want you to think of a person in your close inner-circle of friends and acquaintances. Do you have that person in your mind? Good. Write his or her name down. Now, write below their name all the qualities that you find so attractive in that person. I want you to list at least six personal traits. You could probably list more than six qualities but let's just keep it to the top six.

The next thing that I want you to do is somewhat unpleasant but I want you to do it anyway. (Growth often happens when you are put through difficult assignments.) I want you to think of somebody who you find completely obnoxious and repulsive. Got that name? Write it down. This time, write down all the negative things about that person that makes them so unendearing to you. If there are more than six things just limit it to the worst six.

Go back to the first person, your friend. Think for a moment then write one thing about them that they could improve that would make them even more attractive to you. In other words, I want you to think of the one critical thing in your relationship with that person that annoys you a little bit. Nobody is perfect so something should come to your mind. Write it down and circle it.

Now, go back to the name of the person that you really do not like. You have already listed six things that you find unpleasant about him or her. I want you to try hard at the next small task that I am going to request of you. I want you to think about the one thing that you could find either likeable or neutral about this person. In other words, list the one thing that you could at least give them some credit for. Put your prejudice against this person aside for one moment. Think hard. Write it down and circle it.

Finally, and here is the most difficult part. Turn the sheet of paper over. Write your own name across the top of the page. Draw a line down the centre. On the left-hand side list all the qualities that you feel you have that make you a person who others enjoy the company of. Now, on the right-hand side do the same for your faults. If you think that you don't have any then you are not being honest with yourself. This time don't restrict yourself to just six. Write as many qualities or faults that you can.

Now for the interesting bit...

Were the personality traits of the person that you admire similar to your own? Look at the two lists. Were some exactly the same? What about the person that you dislike? Was that one positive quality also similar?

Did you find that the negative traits of your least favorite person were opposite to the values that you hold dear? That person's friends would also embrace his or her values. There would therefore be a high probability that you could not be on friendly terms with those people either. Reciprocally, they would most likely not get on too well with you. The old cliche "birds of a feather flock together" springs quickly to mind.

We are attracted to people of similar values, ideals and mindsets. Consequently, if you constantly strive to become a better person you will tend to attract people with similar high qualities into your growing circle of influence. The reverse of this is also true. Sinking deeper into an abyss of negativity and depression will tend to attract more of those types of people.

The exciting part of all of this is the fact that you have a choice! You can become:

Which lifestyle will you choose?

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Gary Simpson is a 7th Dan karate master who teaches self defense, motivation, self help and wealth building to students around the world through home study courses. You may reprint this article as you include this author credit and an active link to his web site. Finance - Self Help - Motivation - Self Defense - Personal Growth MotivationSelfEsteem.com